Sexism in Education [a Teaching Perspective]

[Background: I graduated from a university known and praised for its education program. While at university, I tutored 8th graders, interned for 10th graders, and student taught grades 9 and 10. Professionally, I taught English, grades 8-12 for four years, adding 7th grade my last year. I've taught acting, directed plays, and coached. I'm waiting to start a new position for grades 8 and 10 in the fall]

Intro

I'm writing this post because I was reading an article/blogpost of sorts talking about the effect of the push for self esteem in education in the 1990s, particularly on boys. It got me to thinking about my own experiences in teaching/with students, and how my students have possibly/probably been affected by kid/student-specific sexism. So, I'm writing this. It's a little tangential, and ultimately very "from the perspective of me as a teacher", but I hope it will be illuminating for anyone reading it.  Let's get into it!

In the US education system, it is a “known” fact that girls “are doing better” than boys. Their grades are better on average. They get in less trouble. They score better on tests. Currently, this is blamed on the femininity of education:

• Most teachers are female (therefore, boys cannot learn from them)
• As they are female teachers, they must teach in a female way (which boys cannot understand)
• Most schools work as a set of classrooms, where students sit and learn (and therefore, boys, being “naturally” more active and rambunctious, cannot learn in them)
• Schools require discipline and self control (boys, it is known, cannot excel at either).
• [This is paraphrasing what I learned at college, but sources are easy to find]

These assumptions are, of course, ignoring the (rather successful) education systems of yesterday that included mostly or all boys that were more strict/disciplined/rigid than school of today. Boys in the early 1800s were not learning five languages from "being kinetic learners". This also ignores that though most teachers are female, our subject matter is almost exclusively male. Male mathematicians. Male scientists. Male historical figures. Male writers. Male characters. Boys are excused from failing to learn from female teachers, but girls are expected to learn from predominantly male sources. This also ignores girls who are are kinetic learners, boys who are visual learners, etc etc etc ad nauseam. Learning styles are not sexed; we just want to think they are. Ignored also are girls with behavioral disabilities and learning disabilities, more likely to be overlooked because they are socialized to conform better than boys are (a source; this is just something I learned at college, along w/ the above, but a source for those of you interested in learning more). "Boys need recess!!!", ignoring that girls, too, 'need' recess, yet somehow they are able to function better with less.

This is meant in a joking way; yes, of course, there are many important dead white men. However, there are also a lot of other important dead and living people who curiously get overlooked. (source)

In short, every excuse is made for the boy. Of course he cannot learn from a female! (Let us not observe what effect sexism has had on his young mind, or why he (and his parents) think women are unworthy to teach boys.....). Of course he is more active than a girl and will get into trouble if not given outlets!!! (Ignoring that outlets are good for all children, and "boys will be boys" contrasted with "sit down and act like a young lady!!"). Of course of course of course. So, teachers are taught to work around these issues--not to challenge, no, never that--but to make room for them. To concede. Boys cannot learn from women, so reading books only about boys is acceptable to "even it out". Boys cannot be expected to behave, so we'll be more lax on them until it really gets out of hand, then we'll expel them because, well, what is there to be done? He can't learn his way out of these behaviors; he's a boy.

And teachers teach to these assumptions, and this is what their expectations and (more importantly) the expectations of parents are based on. Expectations for boys are low, but, after all "boys will be boys". 

"Students rise to meet expectations" is a mantra teachers know well. However, having expectations based on gendered stereotypes for your students is not just expected or accepted, it is taught at Universities. 

Effects of the Above as I've Experienced Them

At the end of the year, or semester, there is always at least one student who needs a desperate-Hail-Mary-Herculean-save for their grade [this means, me (voluntarily) staying late every night for a week or coming in up to two days after the semester has ended to rain difficult, boring, and strenuous work upon the student until they have chipped their way out the hole they dug for themselves] . In my class, invariably, this need comes directly from a student plagiarizing (usually accidentally) the research paper (10th and 11th grade) or completely failing to turn in the majority of work during the school year (all grades). 

Also, these students are boys. I have never had a female student need this. Why? Have I had female students plagiarize their papers? Absolutely. Have I had female students fail to turn in work? Yes. But why then, are they not represented among the desperate-end-of-year-oh-dear-god-please-let-me-pass-this-class students? Because they work. They are responsible. They do more with less urging. They feel less entitled--entitled to my time and trouble. They are more likely to send me an email or talk to me after class, "is this working?" "have you read my update yet?" They light the fire under (pardon the term) their own asses. They come in before school or after school or during my planning period. I don't usually have to call home for female students.

You go, hardworking, responsible student! Your future is bright! (source)

Parents are much more likely to intervene and make excuses for male students. At the end of the semester, the male students are not the ones coming to me, asking for me to help them save their grade. Their parents are, dragging their woebegone sons* behind them. Their sons, woebegone because they've had infinite chances to help themselves all semester but, unlike their female counterparts, have taken none of them. So, mommy (always the mothers, too) shows up in my classroom at the end of the year, asking what can be done. The son does not email or respond to my emails. His mother does. The son does not come in before or after school; his mother does. 

[*A note: Of course I also have male students who are responsible and care for their grades. They, however are not the focus. I am solely talking about the solely-male end-of-year-ers]

It's apparent to me through these interactions that while female students experience a more "sink or swim" attitude from their parents paired with higher expectations overall, male students are held to lower expectations and receive more help from their parents. This leads to what is called "learned helplessness"--when a student learns that if they just don't for long enough, someone will come along and save them. 

I could write a whole post just on this image. I apologize. (source)

This attitude does not get them far in my class. Above, I said the assignments are "difficult, boring, and strenuous". This is on purpose. Our normal assignments are meant to be challenging (but not difficult), interesting, and only as long as they need to be. I do this on purpose because the students I have needing bailed out at the end of the year are not stupid. They are lazy and spoiled. So, I make it a horrible experience they will never forget. Their moms always want to be in the room, too, I've noticed. They want to watch over their son's shoulder and correct him as he goes. That also is no-go. It's something the student must do alone so that he himself can decide, "I never want to do this again." I tell them all along, "You can do X, which will be simpler and more interesting, or you can not, and end up doing Y, which will be terrible and boring." When we get to Y, they're always surprised to find out I'm telling the truth. That's something else I've noticed with male students, the surprise. The shock.

Male students are most shocked to learn that yes, the rules do apply to them, also. Yes, they must actually turn in work to get a grade. Yes, if they bully a classmate, they will be called out on it. Yes, if they cheat, they must make up the work (and them some) if they hope to see a passing grade. Yes, they must use inside voices. Yes, throwing things out of anger is a punishable offence. (There are sometimes females students who are surprised, as well. Usually no more than two per class, who are star athletes/"popular", but with boys, it's more like.....30-40%) I use "shocked" because that's the word for it. There's always a steep learning curve for new classes as to what is acceptable in my classroom, but it's worth it.

Sexism and Teaching Materials

Until this previous April (I believe it was, maybe March?) I'd been happily teaching away, ignorant of the broken boundaries I was leaving in my wake. For each grade, I taught them from what we had. I  divided up the novels by approximate grade-level and selected pieces from the textbooks to supplement them. Sometimes, if necessary, I'd copy a novel for students, or find an e-version if what we had was not sufficient. I tried to balance out our reading where I could. It's hard to do, sometimes. For example, most American literary canon is writing by and about males. Alright, fair enough. Students need to learn about our culture, but I made sure to include poems by and about women, or myths about Native Americans, or news stories talking about the lives of this group or that. You get my drift. 

Now, where things get really outrageous. In the 8th grade year, all of our novels had female protagonists. Every. One. And the novels I assiduously copied chapter by chapter and handed out to students? Also female protagonists. It just worked out that way, and it didn't bug me because I knew their upcoming years would be rather male-dominated. It also worked out with their age. With each 8th grade class, I'd end up teaching a "gender" unit in which we'd eventually come to realize--wow! Boys can be smart! Wow! Girls can be strong! and so on. (I say "end up" because the unit was 'optional'. I'd teach it when I got tired of the sexism in the students: "girls are weak" "boys are stupid" etc. Sometimes it'd happen early, and sometimes late, but it always happened.)

Now, prepare to be shocked; they liked them. The students, male and female, liked the stories we read. They empathized with the characters and learned from them. They enjoyed the books. They asked questions. They ended up learning a lot about institutional sexism. They learned about femicide and sexism through culture and history. I didn't force it on them. I let them ask questions. Usually, the boys would ask the most questions.

Where last April and the broken boundaries come in: I was at a meeting with all the English teachers from my league, middle school and high school. We were sitting down to talk about maybe doing a league-wide novel reading with inter-school assignments/projects/experiences. It was very fun and exciting on a whole. True to form, there were only 2 male teachers in the room. After talking generalities, like which grade should have this? what time of year? we started talking books. Imagine my surprise when I learned from my fellow teachers:

1) Boys do not like books.

2) Boys will not read books with female protagonists.

3) Boys only enjoy non-fiction-type books, especially War Stories.

4) The best way to make this league-wide project work would be to cater to facts 1, 2, and 3.

I was aghast and a little dumbfounded. These were experienced teachers! I was the youngest and most inexperienced person in the room! And they all nodded their heads sagely, "yes, yes. It is known." Girl stories are special, are spice, and should be taught sparingly to avoid making the poor boys' brains melt.

Pictured: Good for everyone! (source)

Nothing to be said about female students and their interests. Nothing to be said about treating female stories like an "other". Nothing to be said about denying boys fantasy and whimsy. Nothing.

So, of course, I spoke up about my success teaching female-protagonist literature. Homeless Bird, about a child-bride in India. Where the Lilies Bloom, about a girl struggling to keep her family alive in Appalachia in the Great Depression. Bloody Jack, about a young orphan in early 1800s England who lies about her sex to join the Navy. Chinese Cinderella, about a girl despised by her family for being a girl who only wants education and love. Harriet Tubman. To Kill a Mockingbird. Antigone, North and South, Jane Eyre, The Pillow Book. Stories that included women/which I taught from a feminist angle, Romeo and Juliet, "The Lady of Shalott", Canterbury Tales, "The Goblin Market", the Scarlet Letter, and so on and so on. 

I had a realization in that moment. Boys "don't like" girl books because they are allowed to not like them. The books are presented in such a way that says, "we're only doing this because we have to. I know you won't like it," and so they don't. They are not made to understand or empathize with the female characters, so they don't. It's believed to be impossible, so why try?

Horrible. Stupid. Harmful. I've had male students openly weeping in class when we read Chinese Cinderella. Male students going online*, finding (illegal, but hey, fair use!) e-copies of Bloody Jack, turning them into PDFs to share with their classmates, and reading ahead because they just couldn't take the suspense. Senior classes voting to cover "early feminism" for their unit-of-choice. (and so on, and so on)

[*If you're like, whaaa? Why don't they just take their books home? Because we were a school with not-great funding, I tried to keep the books in the classroom as much as I could to avoid loss/damage. And I liked getting our reading done as a class/being all on the same page.]

Hunger strikes. Jiu jitsu. All that good stuff. (source)

I didn't even have to try. I didn't have to coddle or make promises to earn complacency. I simply said, "We're reading X now. It's a great story, about _______. Let's get started."

So, I shared these experiences with my fellow teachers. They were a little surprised, and responded in such a way as to imply that my students must be unique, and it would be Very Difficult to get their students to read anything out of the rigid guidelines of Male Protagonist, Blood and Death, if they'd read at all. (Perhaps they don't enjoy reading because every book they encounter in school is the same? All Macho-Bro-Going-to-War. Perhaps it gets old? Just a thought). Ultimately, we settled on to Kill a Mockingbird, a choice much supported by yours truly, but conceded to in an interesting fashion--'there's things for boys to enjoy, too!' 'it's not really a 'girl' book!' 'it's important!'...

Morality in Education

Teaching morality is a thorny bit. We are supposed to education students for what they should do or be: honesty is good, hard work is good, integrity is good. It's also apparent which criticisms are more common. "You need to work harder/study more!" doesn't get a negative or surprised reaction from students. They're used to this one. This is a common criticism encountered in schools.

In my experience, the one that surprises students rather a lot is "stop being sexist" or "treat girls like humans." Each class I get is taught this lesson, usually just once, in the first year I have them (though, of course, it continues as a thread the whole year, each year). After I had my first year at my past post, it was a lesson I taught to the youngest class each year. It could be sparked by different things.

• The boys are teasing a girl in the class. She looks upset. I ask what's going on. The boys say something like, "_____ likes/doesn't like ________, but she's a girl."
• The boys are teasing a boy in their class. He looks upset. I ask what's going on. The boys say something like, "_____ throws/runs/screams/likes ______ like a girl."
• The girls boys and boys are arguing and frustrated. I ask them what's wrong. The boys say something like, "Why do girls complain about their feet hurting when they wear high heels/their makeup/their clothes? They're the ones who wear them. They're stupid."
• The boys are teasing the girls in class, "Only the boys talk in class! What's the matter, girls, you don't know what to say?"
• Said by boys or girls, triumphantly or resignedly, "I've never met a girl who was as smart as boy."/"Boys are better at everything."

It's always a little jarring for me. They say these things openly, without much encouragement, to me, expecting me to take their side. This means they've been able to do this in the past. They've said these things, voiced these ideas, and been encouraged in them, or at least not discouraged strongly enough to dissuade them from saying such things in the future. What follows from me is a stern questioning session followed by a lecture at the end of which, the class concludes whatever was said was inappropriate, and insulting "girls" is not a good thing to do. They are usually quite shamefaced, and we don't have the issue again. (Which leads me to wonder, if it's that stinking simple, why don't more teachers do it???)

(source)

In rare instances, I overhear a particular student saying something more insidious, "if she didn't dress like such a skank" or, to a classmate, "you're a stupid bitch". This also earns an immediate callout, usually in the middle of a lesson or the middle of helping another student with their assignment. A variation of this exchange follows:

*Me: (in drill-sergeant voice, cutting through whatever noise is going on, pointing at offending student) "WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

Student: (shocked I heard them, shocked I'm calling them out, scrabbling) "Uh, I said (lie)/I didn't say anything/(shocked silence)."

Me: "No no no. What did you say? I'm not asking because I didn't hear you; I heard you. I'm asking so everyone knows."

Student: "Uhm uhm--I can't say it in school/I was just saying....(some excuse/minimized version)"

Me: "What you said was (paraphrased school-appropriate version w/ implication added). I am disappointed in you; you should know better. That is not okay. That is sexist**, and I NEVER want to hear it or anything like it in my classroom again. You shouldn't say it anywhere, ever. But if you say it in here, you don't want to know what will happen to you. Do. You. Understand?"

Student: "Yes/Yes, I'm sorry."

Then, I give a small lesson for the edification of the whole class exactly why whatever thing the student said was bad, and then we continue on our merry way. Happily, I've never had to do that to the same student more than once, nor have I really had to do it in the same class more than once. It's marvelously effective. 

Does it help them in their everyday lives? I'm not sure; I hope so. Does it change their minds about women in places other than my classroom? I'm not sure; I hope so.
I'm hopeful it plants the seed, and if nothing else, it shows the students what is Not To Be Tolerated, at least in my classroom. It shows students they're Safe from that kind of nonsense while in my room. And, over time, in the students I had for multiple years, I did indeed see changes in their attitudes towards women/sexism. Small changes for some, large changes for some, change nonetheless. 

[*This is a technique I learned from my brother, also a teacher.]

[** I also use this when students are being racist, homophobic, just jerks to each other, etc., and it works then, too, but our focus for this article is sexism]

 

(source)

I think it works for a couple of reasons. I think the students have not been called out on this before, so it leaves a big impact (hence the lack of repeat offenders). I think that, for the most part, students/young people are inherently good, but they repeat dumb shit they hear from other places; they don't have arguments or reasons for saying what they say, they just say it, (hence why the lecture works, and if there is any argument, it's easy to show them the other side of it).  It also works because I am a teacher, and they are my students. I have that authority, and I work hard to create a rapport with them. Our everyday classes are fun, creative, and very comfortable/safe, so when something like this happens, and the Disappointed Dragon Teacher comes out, they are affected.

(There's also a gentler version of the above I use when a student is being negative about himself/herself. It's a little less effective, because self-hate tends to be a little deeper entrenched.)

Conclusion

It saddens me that they make it that far, to my classroom, seemingly never having been taught the way to behave. It saddens me teachers are not taught to fight these problems. We're taught to ignore them or work around them. It saddens me that no matter the good impact of a teacher, it can be undone by a student's peers or family. 

So, what is to be done?

• If you are a teacher: hold students to equal expectations. Do not accept sexism in your classroom. Demand more.
• If you are a parent: hold children to equal expectations. Do not accept sexism from your children. Be involved in their education. What is their reading list? Talk to their teachers. Supplement from home; libraries are a wonderful thing. Demand more.
• If you are not a teacher or a parent: hold the people in your lives to equal expectations. Do not accept sexism from your acquaintances and friends. Have higher standards. Demand more.

Love Triangle Dynamics in the Force Awakens [Rey]

Hello and welcome, everybody. This is the third and final piece on Love Triangle Dynamics as seen in The Force Awakens. If you haven’t read Parts I and II yet, I suggest you do. Return readers, hello again! Thanks for coming back.

I’m really excited for this post, as it’s about our wonderful protagonist, Rey. I could go on and on about the design of her character, but I’m going to try to reign it in and keep it within the scope of what we’re talking about.
[Also, I'm sorry if the formatting is wonky. It's been giving me fits for the last forty minutes or so. Blogspot is good, but it sometimes puts extra spaces where there are none....oh well. I hope it doesn't mess with your reading too much!]

Typical Girl in Love Triangle Dynamics

One of the reasons I’m so excited to talk about Rey is because, of all the characters involved in the pattern we’ve been talking about, the Girl character is the most free. This is for two reasons:

1. Sexism—for all that the love triangle rotates around the girl, who she is/what she wants typically doesn’t matter to the pattern. What makes the love triangle is having two guys interested in the protagonist, and their actions (the rivalry, the lying, the protection, the Kidnapping, etc) are what drive that aspect of the plot. The girl’s ultimate choice of Good Guy or Bad Guy doesn’t affect the other aspects of the plot, just the ending.
2. Genre Differences—though a “romantic” pattern, this style of love triangle pops up in all sorts of genres. As the female protagonist is the protagonist, she needs to fit the story. The guys, however, are supporting characters to her; they rely on her, and their actions revolve around her. Therefore, we might have one type of heroine in, say, a Gothic Horror, and a completely different one in a romantic comedy, but the male characters will be pretty much the same.

As this is the case, the Girl-in-Love-Triangle is not a character to be subverted (to subvert, in literature/art, is to subtly tweak/twist the underlying pattern to make a point), but rather is more of a blank slate character who can be added to. That being said, there are some traits that appear more often than not in these protagonist characters:

1. Younger-than or same-age to the male characters—almost never older
2. Good-looking, but not in a conventional way—it’s rare to see these characters written as a 5’8” blonde/redheaded bombshell with the perfect hourglass figure. Their attractive nature comes from within more than from without.
3. Usually disadvantaged in some way—typically money/class-wise
4. Orphaned/lacking full parental support—more common for the mother to be dead than the father
5. Is an innocent/naïve/good person—often these traits are treated interchangeably and tied to their youth. A dash of physical delicacy/weakness is typically included for good measure.
6. Does not protect self very well—but is extremely defensive/proactive about defending friends/family
7. Has an inherent skill or ability that is not ‘common’—this can be a finite skill, like “detective-work”, or a more intangible one like “forgiveness”
8. Holds a non-typical role in society—this can be a quirky job “cupcake-store owner”, a social position “outsider”, or part of their skill/ability “likes to work on cars”

Now, as before, it’s important to note where our character, Rey, fits these “normals” and where she doesn’t. First, the fits:

• She is younger than Kylo and younger than Finn.
• Her most obvious trait is not her looks.
• In the scheme of the galaxy, Rey is very disadvantaged both class and money-wise.
• We don’t know who her parents are or why they’re not with her, but she doesn’t have them and hasn’t had them. She also doesn’t have/hasn’t had viable stand-ins.
• She’s skilled at scavenging, mechanical work, and piloting.
•  Besides her scavenger/piloting skills, Rey has innate force-abilities (very rare), and a background that presumably sets her apart from the others on Jakku.

So, Rey fits this Girl-in-Love-Triangle type enough that we recognize her in the role. Where Rey does not fit the “typical” Girl-in-Love-Triangle protagonist schema is where it gets juicy. This is also where Rey’s design as a “feminist” character comes in.

Strong Female Character

I’m sure we’re all familiar with the “strong female” of action movies. She fights bad guys! She shoots two guns at once! She survives horrifying explosions, and she does it all in heels and a rubber cat suit! (Extra “strong” points are awarded if said cat suit is unzipped to show a bracing amount of cleavage)

Oops. not this one.

Ah, there we go.

You know the type. When these “strong” female characters are designed, it seems not much thought is put into them. They need to be sexy, so the bros in the audience will enjoy themselves, and for the women, a sop of unrealistic physical performance (in heels!) is included. Rey, however, is different. She gives the impression of being designed very deliberately; she meets enough of the common traits so as not to seem too “out there”, but where she has additional traits, they were added thoughtfully and smoothly.

Rey’s Intro—Competence and Solitude

Character introductions are very important. They set the tone for the whole story; they give us our first impression, upon which we are meant to build everything else. For a Girl-in-Love-Triangle, this usually involves something about her being helpful to someone or very cute/clumsy. For Rey, we get this:

At first, her sex is not clear. What is apparent is the character’s skill and solitude, enhanced by the following shots.

We know the character has a knowledge of spaceships and their inner working and seems well-prepared for the task at hand. We know the character works alone in what seems to be a dangerous profession. We know the character had the wherewithal to climb up that freaking rope that looks to be a mile long (mild exaggeration). The character also is confident no one else will come to take from their work, as shown by the rope being left where it is; this further emphasizes the character’s determination/hardworking/skilled nature (going out of the way to find something others don’t) and loneliness (no one bothers to wonder where our character goes every day). Only after these things are established do we learn what Rey looks like and that she is female. Therefore, her establishing character traits are her competence and solitude.

Skills first. Looks second.

She drives off through the barren wastes. The first living creature to share a screen with Rey is that creepy vulture-like-thing. The first character Rey acknowledges is the old woman sitting across the cleaning table from her, but rather than commiserating, Rey remains silent.

"I am the ghost of Christmas future."

"Gross."

Rey’s Home

We’re shown another layer of Rey’s life and character when we see into her home. This set of scenes is when people tend to give Rey the “cute” label. Her home is full of knick-knacks, including a homemade pilot doll.

Then we are immediately treated to Rey’s wall of days.

Though many take her doll to be a sign of “cuteness” , I don’t think that was what the movie is going for. If the doll was for “cute” factor, it should be of something cute, yeah? Instead, it’s a pilot—a person whose job it is to fly around and shoot other people.

The doll, paired with the wall, is not meant to make us say, “awww, how cute”, but to show how irregular and unpleasant Rey’s life is. Again, she is lonely. She still hasn’t spoken. She hangs on to a toy that she doesn’t play with, probably to remind her of more pleasant times in the past. She keeps track of her days, like a prisoner.

The helmet scene is another one taken as “cute”, where, like the dolls, it’s more an indicator of Rey’s mental state. She’s 20. She’s playing make-believe. This isn’t because she’s cute; it’s because her life is terrible, and, again, she’s not playing something “cute”. She’s playing a pilot. Someone who can fly away. Someone who is tough. Someone who fights and kills others.

She still hasn’t spoken.

Wait….Rey….isn’t…..Sweet? The Power of Tropes

First, a word on the power of tropes. Primarily, Rey is an action-protagonist. She’s the hero of an epic-(space) fantasy-story. However, because of the build of Finn and Kylo, she is also the heroine/center of a love triangle. Now, the reason I bring this up is to point out something about how fans perceive Rey. Action heroes fit a certain mold; they are strong, closed-off, and usually have some sort of unpleasant event in their past driving them forward. They get snappy one-liners and kick a lot of butt. Rey fits into this mold as an action hero (she is one), however, when people talk about her, it is not always in this context.

In affectionate descriptions, Rey is called “sweet” “innocent” “the embodiment of the light” “so kind” “so pure” “good” “smol”. As before addressed, these descriptions are very typical of Girl-in-Love-Triangle characters, but Rey does not possess these traits. She is primarily an action hero.

These cute descriptions and assumptions are interesting for two reasons. 1) It proves people are picking up on something out of the typical “action hero!” norm 2) They’re picking up on these character traits despite the lack of groundwork. 

In the previous posts, I talked about how Finn’s intro shows his compassion and Kylo’s paints him as a terrifying villain. If Rey was predominantly “sweet” or “good”, her intro would reflect this. However, her intro serves to highlight her skill and solitude. Then, we get her first lines. Like first impressions, these are important—voice, tone, and words all help the audience understand the character more. If we were meant to find Rey sweet, her first words would mostly likely be sweet. She might offer comfort or friendship to the old lady. She might speak to an inanimate object or animal in a kindly way (think Disney princess). Rey’s first words, however, are yelling.

First Words/Interaction

To this point, Rey has been spoken to (negatively both times), but she has not spoken. Her first words are yelled.

Something like, "What do you think you're doing?!", presumably

This is Rey’s first interaction—arguing.

Next, she tells BB-8 to “shhh” and then insults the Teedo. She fixes BB-8’s antenna, asks after BB-8’s origin, gives advice, and walks away.

When BB-8 begins to follow, Rey responds, “Don’t follow me”, followed with “No” and “No”, before turning to BB-8 and offering a night’s stay, “In the morning, you go.”

And with that, Rey’s full introduction is over. We have been given the base we need to understand her character for the rest of the story.

Intro Summary

Rey is many times shown to be a capable, hardworking, and lonely person. Despite her solitary existence (probably because of it, honestly), Rey doesn’t “play well with others”: Her interactions are overwhelmingly negative, both while giving and receiving. She is the typical love-triangle heroine in some ways, but her character takes a major divergence from the norm in her personality. Rather than being a sweet or kind person, she’s abrasive and apathetic towards the plights of others.

Hit First, Ask Questions Later

Another aspect of Rey’s core characterization is that she hits first and asks questions later. This impulse is shown throughout the movie and has interesting implications for her future.

[Note: Rey’s reasons for her aggressive actions are immaterial. Duh, she has reasons, or she wouldn’t do it. We’re not looking at motivation, we’re looking at action.]

• When Rey hears the commotion with the Teedo, she runs over and engages, yelling angrily, cutting BB-8 loose before knowing the full story, and gesturing with her knife.
• In the marketplace, when the two goons try to steal BB-8, Rey instantly kicks goon #1 in the head, even though all that’s happened is one has thrown a cloth over BB-8.
• When BB-8 says Finn stole Poe’s jacket, Rey’s immediate response is to chase Finn down, beat him with her staff, and let BB-8 zap him twice before letting him speak.

"Let's be friends!"

• On Takodana, Rey attempts to shoot first when she sees a stormtrooper. The only reason she can’t is because her safety is on.

First Attempt

After first successful kill.

Continuing to shoot.

• When Rey sees Kylo for the first time in the forest, she shoots first.
• In the novel, Kylo addresses this, “You would kill me. Knowing nothing about me…I should be the one who should be scared. You shot first…It is I who was forced to defend myself against you.”
• In the forest on Starkiller, Rey shoots first.
• Granted, Kylo has his lightsaber out at the time, but he’s bleeding and makes no moves towards Finn or Rey.
• In fact, though they see him from afar (with enough chance to run if they wanted to), it’s Rey and Finn who walk towards Kylo*.
• In the duel, Rey ignites her saber first and attacks first**
• When Rey gets Luke/Anakin’s saber, she ignites it while Kylo’s is still off. He only turns in his on once hers is on.
• Once both of their sabers are on, it is Rey who charges Kylo, and he moves forwards as a response to her advance.

This aspect of Rey's design flies directly in the face of the common "Does not protect self very well—but is extremely defensive/proactive about defending friends/family" trait. Instead, especially at the beginning, Rey doesn't have anyone to protect and is very proactive and aggressive when it comes to herself and her newly-acquired friends (most notably BB-8). It's in fitting with her role as an action character and with her character background.
[*Going down the question rabbit hole a little bit (I have no answers for these), this is a really weird moment. They all three started walking out of the base at about the same time, but Rey and Finn were much closer to the outside, and they appeared to be running while Kylo was doing his typical stalk; how was it that Kylo was able to beat them to the forest? Did he sprint and then just lie in wait? Why were Rey and Finn so slow? They see him from like 20 feet away, why don’t they just book it out of there? If it’s because they want revenge for Han, why do they wait for Kylo to talk?]

[**I wish I’d noticed this when I was writing my Kylo post, but I noticed it here. In the Starkiller Duel/s, it is Rey and Finn who instigate every engagement. Rey shoots, and Kylo bashes her into a tree in response. Kylo calls Finn a traitor, but it is Finn who charges Kylo, and Kylo only moves once Finn has already begun to attack. Once Finn is down the first time, Kylo is turned away until Finn attacks again. Kylo turns his lightsaber off once Finn is out for the count and only turns it back on when Rey lights her up. Then, again, he doesn’t move to attack until Rey has already charged him. This is a really odd pattern. It could be written this way to show more about Rey and Finn; it emphasizes Rey’s “hit first” thing she’s being doing the whole story, and it shows Finn’s fierceness where his friends are concerned, but it’s weird that it’s every instance on Starkiller….anyway, back to the post]

Fledgling Friendships, BB-8 and Finn

This is the part of the story where Rey gets to grow a little bit in terms of her interactions. We’ve already talked about her meeting with BB-8.

The story continues, and Rey almost sells BB-8 for 60 portions of food. To be fair, that’s a lot of food, and she ultimately does not sell BB-8, but she was very close. After this, Rey becomes more sympathetic to and protective of BB-8, as highlighted in Rey’s concern for BB-8 after learning of Poe’s “death” and of Rey’s keeping track of BB-8 during the escape from Jakku.

The beginning of Rey’s relationship with Finn parallels her relationship with BB-8 in a couple ways.

• Both begin with Rey being aggressive towards someone: Finn first sees her beating two men with her staff.
• This is followed by aggressive behavior towards the pre-friend: Rey then attacks Finn with her staff, knocks him down, and yells at him.
• These negative moments are not followed by an apology of any kind.
• There is a denial of intimacy: “What are you doing?”/”Let go of me!”/“I know how to run without you holding my hand”/”Stop taking my hand!”
• Then a slow opening up: Rey helping Finn up when he’s knocked out and including him in her escape.

Rey’s faster warming up to BB-8 is, I think, due to BB-8’s robotic nature and immediate loyalty. Rey might be more comfortable about BB-8 because he is not strictly “alive”, and Rey is used to working with machines. Finn, on the other hand, is a person, and people are more complicated and fraught. BB-8 does not ask much of Rey, either. He attaches himself to her, but he doesn’t make any demands. Finn, on the other hand, has wants. He wants to know her past and motivations, wants to know if she has a boyfriend, wants her to leave Jakku permanently, wants her to leave the quest and come to the Outer Rim with him, wants her to view him in a positive light. BB-8 doesn’t seem to mind Rey’s negativity, but Finn is human and needs more out of Rey.

What really brings Finn and Rey together is their synergy over the next few scenes. As a former soldier, this is probably nothing new to Finn. For Rey, however, this is something completely new. I think the idea that she can accomplish more with another person (and have fun!) is a game-changer for her. Rey gets her first “happy in another’s presence” moment after she, Finn, and BB-8 escape Jakku.

It's blurry because they move so much >.<

This is also an important moment to Rey because it’s a fulfillment of her dreams. She wants to be a pilot with all that entails; she wants to belong; she wants to escape the drudgery; she wants her skills to pay off. All of this happens in the escape; it’s probably the height of her life up to this point.

She starts to think of herself as part of a team, “He’s part of the Resistance. He’s going to get you home. We both will.” (emphasis mine). This is also when we (finally) learn her name.

It should be noted, however, that Rey is not 100% opened up. While dealing with an emergency in the bowels of the Millennium Falcon, Finn tries to make small talk, but Rey is all business.

Rey: “Get me the bonding tape. Hurry.”

Finn: “What about you?”

Rey: “I’ve got to get back to Jakku.”

Finn: “Back to Ja—why does everyone want to go back to Jakku?”

Rey: “It’s not that one.”

Finn: “That place is—”

Rey: “No. The one I’m pointing to. No. No. No. If we don’t patch this up, the propulsion tank will overflow and flood the ship with poisonous gas!”

….

Finn: “Hey, Rey, you’re a pilot; you can fly anywhere. Why go back? You got a family? Gotta boyfriend? Cute boyfriend?”

Finn is clearly more interested in furthering the friendship, even ignoring the crisis at hand to try to learn more personal information about Rey. Rey, however, is more concerned about fixing the ship and shuts down every one of Finn’s overtures.

Intimacy, Friendship, and Rey

Rey and Finn are fledgling friends, but they don’t trust each other. While Finn shows his distrust by lying, Rey shows her distrust by refusing to share information and by rejecting intimacy. This fits Rey’s more closed-off nature. This dynamic is shown throughout the movie in different ways. We see it when Finn grabs Rey’s hand and she rejects him. We see it when Rey is fixing the Millennium Falcon. We see it shortly afterwards when the Millennium Falcon is getting sucked up by Han.

We see it in their interactions on Takodana, and when Rey avoids Finn’s question, “Did he hurt you?” on Starkiller Base.

Rey’s relationships and interactions with others are predicated on avoidance; she doesn’t willingly tell anyone anything about herself. She’s a private individual. This is good because it’s good writing; her traits carry through, but it’s also nice because she’s a female character with these traits. Normally, a female character in her place is always written as friendly, and they spend their time making overtures to the brooding male characters. The writers have flipped that, and I think it’s quite lovely.

Significance of Rey’s Taciturnity

Naturally, there’s another, symbolic, side to this. In Kylo’s section, I spoke about how the Confession^TM scene was subverted in a big way. In order for the Confession to be spun in this reversed way, Rey needs something to confess. If she’s already spilled her guts to every character she comes across, this subversion loses meaning. The poignancy of “this guy knows my Secret and gets me but is super evil” is also lost if Rey doesn’t keep herself so closed off.

Rey keeping mum also affects how the audience learns about her. In stories, it’s common to learn about characters through what they say to other people. However, as in real life, characters often present themselves as better than they actually are, (a la “Yeah, I’m part of the Resistance”) in order to impress who they’re talking to. If most of a character’s characterization is done in this way, our view of them is skewed. We don’t know who they really are; we only know who they want people to think they are. Rey’s development is different. We learn about her in two ways: from the vision and her reactions to it and from non-consented mind reading.

Our greatest leaps for Rey’s character come in Takodana with her vision and subsequent interaction with Maz and on Starkiller Base with the Confession^TM.

Rey on Takodana

Takodana is important for many reasons. Today, we’ll be focusing on what we learn about Rey’s motivations while on Takodana.

As noted above, Rey does not share her personal life with others. On Takodana, we get a rare window into her psyche.

We’re tipped off to what’s to come with Finn’s plan to leave to the Outer Rim and Rey’s intense, “don’t go,” response. This stands out a little; why does Rey care so much? They haven’t known each other that long. This moment exists to ping and prepare us for her vision; it’s abandonment foreshadowing.

Consider our heartstrings tugged.

Ah, yes. This reveals a key part of the character that’s been built for Rey thus far. This is why she wants to go home. This is why she’s never left, even though it’s terrible. This is why she doesn’t trust people. This is why she reacts so strongly to Finn wanting to leave.

We also witness the moment Rey is set free from this fear. Using her “eye reading” power, Maz tells Rey, “…You already know the truth. Whoever you’re waiting for on Jakku—they’re never coming back.”

They’re Never Coming Back

This is the linchpin moment for Rey’s character. Up until this point, her entire motivation has revolved around this secret past. She wants to go back to Jakku because she’s waiting for her family. All of her issues stem from her abandonment. She’s devoted her whole life to waiting for these people to come back for her. She cannot move forward until this part of her life has been closed.

Not only this, but apparently Rey’s “known” that they’re not coming back for some time; she just hasn’t acknowledged this fact. She is just too entrenched in waiting, and this has taken away her ability to change. Who will she be without this? In a way, it’s a trial by fire. Rey is able to leave these fears behind by realizing them. Only by accepting the truth is she able to grow.

This realization also comes at a very convenient time. She’s literally been waiting almost her whole life for this moment, and just as she’s losing what gave her life meaning, she’s gained something else—the Force. And along with the Force, she’s given a mission, “Someone still could.”

She gets to trade her external motivation for an internal one. Rather than waiting for someone who may or may not bother to show up, she is able to pursue. Finally, she will be an actor in her own life. Not only this, but her new journey involves improving herself and her innate abilities. Her story has become about herself.

In one tidy happenstance, Rey’s agency is revealed and her life is given meaning. No longer existing for subsistence, Rey has a part to play in a game with greater significance. This has “hero’s journey” written all over it; it’s the call to action.

And, as is typical to the hero’s journey, Rey rejects the first call. It’s too much, too scary, too soon, and she runs away into the woods.

Forest of Takodana: Accepting the Call

Rey’s acceptance of her Destiny does not come all at once; she accepts her fate in dribs and drabs over the rest of the movie. It all begins in the forest.

By running into the forest, Rey is attempting to go back to her life-homeostasis; herself, alone, battling the elements. She does not run to the comfort of her new-found friends, even though Han is knowledgeable about Luke and the Force; even though Finn is familiar with being thrust suddenly into new and frightening circumstances. She wants to be alone, because she knows she can depend on herself. She even rejects BB-8, saying, “You have to go back. I’m leaving…you have to go back; you’re too important. They’ll help you,” showing she’s chosen (once again) to internalize a negative view of herself—just-a-scavenger/not-important—it also shows Rey’s attempt to take herself out of the team. It went from “We’ll help you” in the Millennium Falcon to “They’ll help you”.

However, as Maz said, the answer does not lie behind Rey, as she soon realizes herself. She’s content run away until she sees the invasion of First Order ships. Realizing she can’t go back to caring just about herself anymore, she runs back towards the group. This is the first acceptance; accepting she’s part of something bigger.

This acceptance is magnified when Rey and BB-8 are on the run again. Rey tells BB-8 to go ahead without her.

Note her wording, “I’ll try to fight them off” (emphasis mine). Rey is not confident about her chances of survival, but she thinks she’ll be able to give BB-8 enough of a head start to matter. This is really touching. Just ten minutes ago, Rey was going to leave everyone to their own devices, but now, realizing she’s part of something bigger, she’s willing to sacrifice herself so her side has a better chance of winning. These six words show an important shift in Rey’s character; even though she’s facing the most intense disappointment of her life, she subsumes her own needs and emotions to help out everyone else. And just like that, she’s on her way to hero status. This is a nice touch by the filmmakers. Female protagonists tend to be too far one way in the beginning; either they’re so comically evil their turnaround doesn’t make sense, or they’re the embodiment of sweetness and light and have no real need to change or grow. Rey fits neatly in the middle; she’s a well-rounded character with motivations and actions that fit together.

The Kidnapping^TM

Takodana is the most key point in the movie for Rey’s character development. Not only to we have our first reveal into her mind with her visions and subsequent conversation with Maz, we have the Kidnapping^TM  which leads to our second (and last) look into Rey’s psyche.

Keeping with the Love Triangle Dynamics, Rey is Kidnapped^TM  by the Bad Guy of our story, Kylo Ren. It’s an old trope but a true one. Though a typical development, this occurrence is not lazy, nor does it undermine the strength of Rey’s character. Rather, it is in fitting with Rey’s characterization up to this point, and it sets up the audience for a greater pay-off at the end of the movie.

As we’ve already covered, the Kidnapping^TM  leads to the Confession^TM  on the part of the Bad Guy (BG).  In TFA, this trope gets subverted; many people who dislike the Kidnapping^TM   dislike it for the disempowerment of the female character; when this character is a Strong Female^TM, this dislike tends to be stronger. Again, in a tidy fashion, TFA keeps the Kidnapping^TM while still portraying Rey’s agency and strength.

• In the beginning of the scene, Kylo gives Rey the power of the room by manipulating his stance to be lower-than, less-than, inferior. It’s very rare for a BG to act this way in a Kidnapping ^TM.
• Rey keeps her cool throughout the scene despite her fear and the possible danger of her situation.
• Rey is in control of herself, and therefore, more in control of the situation. There is a push-and-pull nature to her and Kylo’s interactions, but Kylo is the one more moved/affected by instinct and Rey. She has a greater affect on him than he does on her.

The Confession^TM Flip

We’ve already talked about this in Kylo’s post, but the focus will be on Rey’s side of things. From the female side of the Confession^TM:

• Typically, the BG confesses to the protagonist as she passively absorbs the information, tucking it away to be dissected or disseminated later.
• Typically, the protagonist takes no part in the Confession ^TM; the BG leaves the scene without learning anything new about her. The scene is about his characterization. Perhaps, as a side effect of the BG’s confession, the protagonist gains the trait of “good listener” which may or may not be carried through the narrative.

The Confession flip of TFA is done in two primary ways:

• Kylo takes a Confession from Rey. Rather than being a scene solely about Kylo and Kylo’s motivations, the scene is equally important to the characterizations Kylo and Rey. They both have two moments of ‘reveal’, and this, their second, is with each other.
• Rey takes the Confession^TM from Kylo.
• Though Kylo reveals some of his inner workings through his actions in this scene, the big reveal is taken from him the same way he took Rey’s from her.
• Rey and Kylo are now more intimate with each other than they are with anyone else.
• This puts the characters on equal footing; they know the same amount about each other, and they have both experienced the same thing at each other’s hands.

Rather than making the interactions and characterization one-sided, the filmmakers subverted the trope. We still have the Kidnapping^TM and the Confession^TM, showing these to be important to the story (wonder why….), but they are subtly tweaked to keep Rey on equal footing with her male foil.

Empowerment Height: The Snow Fight

Between the interrogation and snow fight, we have a few more great moments from Rey; she successfully commands someone using the Force; she frees herself (very important as Finn’s rescue attempt puts her solidly in the ‘damsel in distress’ category), and she’s well on her way to stealing a ship and escaping when she meets up with Han, Finn, and Chewbacca. We see a further defining of Rey and Finn’s relationship; she ignores his question “did he hurt you?”, but expresses her joy/appreciation that Finn came to get her.

But, rushing along, to the snow fight! A couple of notes before we begin: many people say this is Rey’s most-empowered scene for many reasons. I do not agree with most of them. I’m going to break those down first.

It’s empowering because she’s whupped Kylo’s ASS!!!!
This is normally tied to the idea of “women can only be empowered when they’re beating men”, and it has sinister implications. I don’t buy into this idea in general, and—
Kylo was working at a disadvantage (shot by bowcaster, emotionally dealing with Han’s death, plus had fought Finn right before fighting Rey), meaning Rey didn’t beat him at his best, negating any empowerment coming purely from winning. Beating someone with a handicap isn’t “winning”.
Also, as covered in Kylo’s post, I do not think he was trying to hurt her. This functions as a motivational handicap. It’s stated that Rey wants to kill Kylo, but we have nothing to indicate he wants to kill her.
This also credits Rey’s empowerment to violence; it’s “empowering” because she’s done something violent and maimed another being. At least as far as the SW universe goes, this sort of thing is bad—dark-side. If Rey’s empowerment requires her to be angry/dark/violent, it’s not very good, is it?
Rey is empowered by acting as an avenging angel who is punishing Kylo for killing his father!!!!!
This one makes Rey’s strength all about men rather than about herself. “Her empowerment comes from her hurting a man for killing another man!” Hurray. This undermines Rey’s own feelings about/hatred towards Kylo and replaces them with some odd second-hand motivation.
We have no reason to believe Rey knows about Han and Kylo’s relationship. Han never told her Kylo was his son, and Kylo never told her Han was his father. Sure, there were hints given here and there, but we have no indication she put these hints together. Han and Kylo’s discussion on the bridge is much too quiet for Rey to have heard. She possibly/probably could have made out Han yelling “Ben!” and figured they knew each other somehow, but knowing they were father and son? That’s a stretch from the material.
Another indicator she doesn’t know is that, during the fight, she says nothing about it. She calls Kylo a “monster”—probably the worst thing she can think of, but she doesn’t throw “you killed your own dad!” in Kylo’s face despite the great ammo this would make.
It’s empowering because she saved Finn!!!
Usually, this is tied to some idea that this is the first time she’s saved Finn, and that she’s returning the favor for all the times he’s saved her….No. Just no. Rey saved Finn on Jakku and got him off-planet. Rey saved Finn from the rathtar. Finn failed to save her on Takodana, and by the time he got to Starkiller base, she was already well on her way to saving herself. Yes, Finn fights Kylo while Rey is passed out, but there’s so much more to this scene than Rey evening the score with Finn.
And, again, this makes her empowerment about a man.         

Now, for why it’s actually empowering. 

The duel scene is empowering as the culmination of Rey’s character as portrayed by the movie to this point. The key aspect is this: Rey has “become” more fully herself through her abilities with the Force. She fully embraces it for the first time. This is the source of her agency; it’s her innate ability that allows her to control her destiny. We saw this building in her escape from the interrogation room, but she wasn’t using all aspects of the Force. In the duel:

• The lightsaber goes to her, and she takes it, accepting it.
• She uses it, unafraid this time.
• She uses the Force mentally, using it to calm herself and keep her head in the game.
• And this mental use of the Force is shown physically, when, at the end of the duel, she begins using her lightsaber with skill and precision, allowing her to defeat Kylo.
• At the end of the duel, when Kylo is on the ground, we see further development from Rey in that she doesn’t kill him. In the novel, this moment is written, “She recoiled from it. From the dark side.” Meaning that, even before the ground split them apart, Rey had made the “light” (right) choice of not killing Kylo Ren. This is different from her “hit first, ask questions later” modus operandi shown in the rest of the movie.

Though Rey’s moment of empowerment is a violent moment, and it does come after Han dying and Finn defending her, this moment is about Rey, Rey’s abilities, and Rey’s acceptance of herself. This is what makes it her most empowering moment; she’s beginning to come into her own. Her acceptance of the call to action is complete.
Finding Luke

Finding Luke at the end of the movie is a continuation of the empowerment Rey found in the Starkiller duel. In the duel, she accepts herself, her abilities, and her destiny. Finding Luke shows she followed through. On Starkiller, she was caught between a rock and a hard place; afterwards, it would be easy for her to let it slide and go back to how she was. However, she continues her growth, independently seeking Luke out to bring him his lightsaber and (as implied) to seek training.

Conclusion

Rey fits into the Love Triangle Dynamics in that she is a female character who experiences the typical actions of the male-characters-in-the-Love-Triangle-Dynamics; she is lied to by the Good Guy and Kidnapped by the Bad Guy, and so on. However, she is not “just” that character. She is written in an atypical manner; instead of friendly, sweet, and innocent, Rey is unfriendly, acerbic, and a little world-weary (if naïve at times). These traits allow Rey to more fully inhabit her own story and keep the story revolving around her. The subversions in the plot, as seen in the oddly reversed-Confession, develop Rey’s character more fully and allow her to keep and enhance her agency rather than turning her into a pawn between Good and Evil (or Good Guy and Bad Guy).
I really appreciate this about Rey's design. Though she's part of a sexist trope, the film creators made sure Rey was a solid, unique, strong, rounded character with agency. Even in moments like the interrogation or Finn's damsel-in-distress-rescue (which by definition take freedom away from the female protagonist) Rey manages to realistically take control of the situation, further cementing herself as an actually strong character.

As far as where the Love Triangle Dynamics will end up, I’m not sure. There have been some hints about a romance or romances showing up in Episode VIII, but that’s it. Finn, Kylo, and Rey may have been written in this manner for Episode VII, but there is nothing to say the pattern must continue into episode VIII. After all, other than Finn’s “You got a boyfriend?” line, we have no reason to suspect romantic interest between the characters. It could have been included to showcase Rey's strength and how she's different from other heroines of her type. It could have been included to keep the audience's attention on Rey by making two prominent characters concern themselves with her. We'll only know when the series is done.

I know some people are hoping for no romance at all; they want Rey to remain single. Personally, I hope this is not the case. Some people consider singledom necessary for women to be Strong^TM, but I am not one of these people. I think romantic love is uniquely rewarding and inspiring. If done the right way, a romance would not weaken Rey’s character. As shown by TFA, she can be in the center of a Love Triangle--a dynamic that typically doesn’t concern itself with the female character--and still have agency, grow as an individual, and be more than a stereotype. If the film creators continue to do as well with Rey as they did in TFA, falling in love would not take this away from her; it would just show us another side of an already-complex character.